Life is too short to live..(Part-1)

I was on my Manali tour with my friends, was the second day of my trip I was sitting with my girl in the back seat holding her hands and we were on our way to Rohtang Pass…

My phone rang and it’s my Mom’s call she was sounding low and just asked what I was doing, I had a feeling that something had happened at home but that time I ignored that as she was resting on my shoulder. I don’t want to distract her comfort and ignored my feeling..

At the time we reached the destination, preferred to call my Mom but I was out of the network area.. Oops.. then we enjoyed ourselves and came back to our place I called Bhai to ask if everything is alright at home, he told me that Papa is not well..

The next day was the return of our trip, the mixed feeling inside my head as I don’t want this trip to end so soon and also I want to know what had happened at home.

Finally, I reached home my dad was walking outside the house as it was 5 in the morning I greated him and ask about his health and I noticed some marks on his face.. I placed my bags in my room and headed towards Mom’s room and asked about his mark as if he had some fight with someone. She ignored my questions and asked to take a rest for some time then we need to go to the doctor.

Without wasting time I booked our appointment at Max hospital and asked my dad to get ready for the checkup. It was 8 in the morning we both were settled in the car as it was 1.5 hours away from our home. On our way, I asked dad “Kya Hua papa apko ap mjhse share kro he replied beta merko feel ho rha hai kch hai mere face p merko yeh mark kch shi nhi lag rha “

In my anger “aap kch b galt sochte ho hojayege thik dekh Lena Abhi doctor k pass jaa rhe hai who bhi yhi khega ap log ase hi tension lete ho Choti Choti bat p”.

He replied:- I wish “ asa hi ho Jase jo sab bol rhe hai”

We reached our destination but I was in my thoughts “Papa ne asa kyu bola merko kya chl rha hai unke mind mai “

It was our turn to see the doctor, we entered and he asked for the issue and highlighted the spot on his face and he had mentioned a few of the test and ask the nurse to take the patient as soon as he left doctor said this is cancer on his mouth I was in the shock I don’t know how to react on this I was so numb. Just asked “woh thik hojayege na kch hoga toh nhi I am very small in my age I can’t afford to lose him now” Say doctor something, things will be fine I had tears in my eyes. It was the feeling as if I don’t have a roof on my head I felt so helpless, just want to cry very loud shout like hell. So that the stone on my heart will break into small pieces.

After 2 hours of patience again nurse announce my name I went and the doctor said we can’t treat him as the case is not in our hands now. He doesn’t have much time.

I begged for his life to the doctor I went to the Gurudwara made promises that will not fight with him anymore, will not shout at him. will not tease him. I promise I will take every good care of him please save him, please. I love him so much please you can’t do this to us.

Finally, we are on our way back there were tears in my eyes on our whole way back home a complete silence at every red light my eyes were only on him to see if he is fine or not.

I ran to my Mom as soon as I reach her I hugged her tight and cried a lot and told everything to her she was broken into small pieces. we can’t see our loved ones in pain but this is the time when the doctor said my Dad had no more time in this world. How can God be so cruel to us? How?

Suddenly there was a call from my only one I told her everything I cried in front of her on call. She made me understand everything supports me in that time.

We consulted every doctor so that he will be fine. Every single second is so critical from him. He doesn't want any of us to see him in this condition. So, he started sitting in the car by switching on the AC and locked him selves inside so that no one notices what he is going through.

Nowadays, his body is not responding to the kemos he is getting week day by day he has a food pipe in his mouth he can't walk, can’t speak properly.

He was one of the active people of our family who had laughing nature in our family. How can this happen to him how?  We can't see him dying every second.. God do something. Please..

Bidding Good Bye’s are always difficult….

 The reality of life & one of my favorite lines:

You came naked,

You will go naked.

You arrived weak,

You will leave weak.

You came without money and things,

You will leave without money and things.

Your first bath? Someone washed you.

Your last bath? Someone will wash you.

This is life!!!

we never know when we are on our last days. Which is our last night our last hug, laugh, cry, or pain.

It’s a human saying that a girl is always attached to her father and a boy is always attached to his mother.

Before marriage father will be like if you want you can take “Pata Nhi tera Ghar Kase Hoga vha terko milage ya NHI aj terko jo cheye tu Lele Kal kya hoga”

Father always ensures that the dream, demand of her daughter must be complete. At the time of marriage of a girl, the father is the only person who cries a lot as his princess will leave their house and gonna settle in another house.  

He hardly talks to his daughter but always ensures from his wife if she is indeed of anything.

The importance of being a father is so different in a daughter's life even if this relation faces lots of ups and downs but the father is always different from every other relationship in every girl's life.

The day we woke up everything was on the routine in the house. The last night Nannu was not well he was roaming in the house. So, he slept at 4 Am. So we preferred not to disturb him let him sleep take complete rest and we will wake him after some time.

Ladies are enjoying tea on the balcony kids were watching cartoons. Nanni went to wake him up so that he can have some breakfast and then he can sleep properly. He called him many times but no response was received. They called the nurse who leaves near the house to check if everything is fine...

Every second is like hell why isn’t he responding a few hours back he was walking on the balcony now what had happened. The nurse arrived, the heartbeat of every person was so high. Everyone was waiting for the nurse to say that he is fine. But no one knows that was his last night with us. The noise he was creating was last will not be able to listen to this ever in our lives.

Everyone arrives to bid goodbye but the daughter was so helpless at that moment as who will ask for my demands, who will wait for me at the door when we use to visit my father’s house.

 Due to some situations, the cremation was on the next day. That night Nannu was on the balcony and every child was sleeping next to him. The last sleep with the father who is no more in this world.

People come but will never be able to listen to the small noises or the loud noise “chai NHI Banani kya”.

Everyone says “ana hai toh Jana Bhi hai” but giving farewell will always so difficult.